It’s been a quiet few weeks in the Roc sex house, both Ethan and I are working full time, homeschooling, disinfecting everyone and everything, there has been little quiet time for reconnecting, so we decided to come up with our own version of Olympics to play once the kids can be shipped off for a weekend.
Welcome to the 2020 quarantine sex games, inspired by social distancing and self-isolation, I think this could become an annual event where couples can make the choice to partially self-quarantine (hopefully come next spring we will no longer be forced to abstain from touching strangers). So to those that are lucky enough to have a willing and fun partner at home I have decided to come up with some suggestive sex games, just like the Olympics some of these games will be judged on speed, some will be judged on creativity, some will be on strength, don’t worry guys, the one arm push-up isn’t included, and I’m not talking about the arms on your upper body. Hopefully next year we can make it a group event, isn’t that a ray of sunlight during our dark times?
With that said, let the games begin.
Find the Honey.
So we begin with the first game. For this game you will need a stopwatch and a blindfold. You can use peanut butter or some other sticky food, if you don’t like the idea of botulism, which isn’t a real risk unless you’re an infant, if that is the case you are a baby genius and you shouldn't be reading this smut.
Blindfold your partner and smear some of your desired food somewhere on your body, start the timer and your partner has to find the food source using only their mouth. Now for my male readers, even though this is an easy way to a bit of a blowie, it's also a time where you can be a little more creative. Point system is pretty simple. One point and bragging rights to the person who finds the food the quickest.
Another tip for my readers who plan on dipping their nether regions in the peanut butter, make sure all pets are out of the room, I will not be responsible for the fall out from the dog chomping on your bits and stealing the points due to your lack of creativity.
This one is where your creative juices flow. Firstly decide on how the picture will be judged, this one is best played when the kids are asleep (check and check again, no one wants to explain why mom is attempting to take a pic while doing splits naked on the dining room table). In this game, the goal is to take the most creative sexy picture, now sexy is in the eyes of the beholder so if naked dining room gymnastics is your thing then shoot for the moon. Ethan loves photography so we play with lights and shadows, taking more abstract photos. Point goes to whoever is more creative, sexy or funny.
Or strip blackjack if poker isn’t your thing. Firstly make sure you have the same number of items on, every time someone loses a hand they have to remove an item of clothing, obviously the person who loses all their clothes first doesn’t receive the point. But I’m sure you’ll enjoy the confidence boost from seeing your partner’s eyes focused solely on you. If casino games go against your strict no gambling household rules, I wouldn’t want to condone the breaking of rule and in that case, I suggest strip Go Fish, and an item of clothing is removed for each pair that is completed.
Naked Hide and Seek.
Another one for when the kids are asleep and hopefully you don’t live in a 400sqf studio. Set the timer again. One partner goes first and gets one minute to hide, make note of the time once the partner has been found and you’ve stopped laughing at the audacity of this game I made up. Point goes to whoever manages to hide the longest. If you’re wondering why it's naked hide and seek..,you are on the wrong blog, just go with it.
The edging game.
Masturbate your partner, take him or her to the edge, partner has to resist orgasming, quickest to cum loses….however, let’s be honest here no one actually loses in this game. As an added equalizer for those that complain their partner takes forever to finish...toys and visual aids can be used.
The guessing game.
Each partner gathers up five items, you can make this game sexy or silly. As I am in a rather silly mood today I will stick with that theme. This time round the partner laying down is blindfolded. Each partner will take turns using said items on the blindfolded partners body. One point for each correctly guessed item. Obvious items would be dildos, feathers, strawberries etc. But if you are like me and want to go strange, I would roll a can across your thigh and give you extra points if you can guess that it's a can of sweetcorn.
Give each other a budget of $10. Each person has to search the interwebs for the most obscure sex item for that price. If money is tight, you don’t have to buy it, if you can afford to waste $10 make the purchase, wait the obligatory six weeks for the item to ship from china, quarantine said product for a few more days and then laugh when you pull out the butt plug that looks like it will splinter upon first use. Point goes to whoever finds either the most unique item or the best bargain.
Winner of the first annual Quarantine games wins the right to pick his or her own prize, whether it is a week of chores done by the loser, or a whole day of pampering, or maybe you just want 24 hours of alone time, whatever you want, make it a good one, and make this time together fun. Quarantine is usually a time where patience is tested and it will be easy to fall into a destructive pattern, so take this time to relax, drink wine, and laugh. Happy play my horny ones.